Tuesday, 11 September 2012

Waiting on God is Hard sometimes

Hello everyone! It's been a long time, I must apologize for that! From the last time that I wrote not to much new has been happening in my life.

The last time I had a decision to make, school here or to pursue Ecuador. With a lot of praying and talking to others and looking deep inside, I realized that my passion was in missions and not so much in school. So I chose to pursue Ecuador.

Silly me I thought it was just a matter of saying yes and going...lol boy was I mistaken.

I have no answers for you all on when I'll be going back. As of right now International Teams is talking to Youth World the organization in Quito Ecuador that Heartland partners. They are talking about an internship for me...I have no idea what that involves or how long it will be or when.

So as of right now I am trying to give it all to God. The song Jesus All for Jesus has been the song that has been playing in my head, the line where is says "all of my ambitions, hope, and plans I surrender these into your hands."Sometimes that is easier said then done if you know what I mean!

So where am I at right now, I am not sure. I am feeling pretty lost...I am not sure if God has officially closed that door to Ecuador or if is just testing my faith in Him.

So in the meantime I have jumped back into being involved at Heartland! Tomorrow I start my jr. high girls small group. As well as I am leading worship in the Grade 1-4 Sunday school class! And youth has started full force!

My job at Robinhood has slowed right down again, as it normally does in the fall, so I am currently (with God's direction) trying to figure out what my next step should be job wise. The hardest thing is I don't know what I wanna do. It's discouraging sometimes. I feel like in the movies..I'm standing still and everything around me is going CRAZY fast and is blurry around me.

Lately I have been under spiritual attack, thought have been flooding my mind and thought...saying things like 'Carla you have failed and let everyone down(in regards to not being in Ecuador yet)' or 'Carla what you thought God was say about you going to Ecuador was wrong' and so on...

I am asking you all to help me pray against these negative thought, for protection so I won't start believing them...which there have already been times when and where I have believed these thoughts. That's when I need God and His truth the most.

Please pray for direction...like do I get an other job while I wait, and if so what kind, do I check out what the requirements are for becoming a foster parent, or do I go to school and if so to take.

All I know is that my ambitions, hopes and dreams are My to be a mother and or be a missionary.

Thanks everyone! I appreciate you all and all your prayers and support more then words can express!

1 comment:

  1. Aw, Carla! You are in my prayers daily. You are such a blessing to our family and I don't know what I would do if you were gone to Ecuador right now! I can't thank you enough for helping me keep my sanity! Hugs and prayers